Saturday, February 19, 2011

Last Goodbye...



For a while now I’ve been trying to keep all my pain and emotions hidden; trying to avoid further hurt to the people I love. From time to time, I filled my hours with draining activities trying to tire myself physically and mentally in order to keep my sanity, guarding myself from being consumed with my own thoughts and feelings. But the sad thing is that no matter how hard one tries, he can never seem to escape from his true feelings. I even came to a point whereby I hurt myself during one of my training. But the pain from these flesh wounds are nothing compared to the pain I have to bear for having to part with the people who are so dear to my heart (whether they know it or not). My best friend once told me “pain is unavoidable, but suffering is optional” So I guess I shouldn’t cry because it’s over but smile because it happened. This separation has made me realize that we have to treasure everything we have. Living in the shade of sorrow does not help, only when you cheer yourself up, follow your heart, and go by your will, will you be able to stand up again.

“As life goes on, I start to learn more and more about responsibility and I realise that everything I do is affecting the people around me. So I want to take this time now, to apologise all the things that I’ve done and things that haven’t occurred yet and things that they don’t want to take responsibility for.” – Akon

All the actions and decisions that I’ve made are for, what I think, the best in the long run. I may be right I may be wrong or neither, I know not for sure for I am just a man in a silly red sheet (Five for Fighting - Superman).

During this period of stormy days there is one particular song that I listen frequently because it captures my thoughts almost perfectly. And because I’m never too good with words, I’ll just attach the lyric of the song below since it encapsulates what I want to say but in a more delicate and sophisticated way:

Vitamin C - Graduation (Friends Forever)

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of the night in June
I Didn't know much of love, but it came too soon
And There was me and you, and then it got real blue
Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and
We would get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels
Chorus:
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change, from whatever
We will still be, friends forever
So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money
When we look back now, will that joke still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
*Repeat chorus*
La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there? Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
*Repeat chorus 3x*





David Foster - Just for a Moment (St Elmo's Fire theme song)

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